Just listening to Madonna — the title of this post doesn’t really have anything to do with the actual post.

There’s this guy at work — a fucking downer who’s never got anything good to say about anything or anyone. (Sounds like he’d be perfect for me, huh? And the thing is, I actually get the sense that he likes me — though, I don’t really have any evidence, per se.)

Anyways, I got sick of him always criticizing other people’s design work, so I assigned him the design aspect for the upcoming project to see what he could come up with.

Being the leader means I can do that kind of shit.

It’s like, he’s always criticizing other people — and the implication is that he could do better…so let’s see if he can actually do better. I’d like to be pleasantly surprised, but at the same time, I want to show that I’m different from my boss, who’s the sort of oaf who gets used to one person handling everything and just assumes that nobody else knows how to do it.

I sort of felt like clapping myself on the back and saying, “Good job, girl! You so open minded!”

Anyways…when I was heading out for a business lunch today, I actually saw this guy I used to go to high school with.

I know I sound like a complete shit for saying this, but he was never the sort of guy any girl in her right mind would have had a crush on…and because I’m crazy, I had a crush on him.

He was hilarious, smart, and creative…but he had so much acne, you could barely make out a face.

I know that sounds like a gross exaggeration, but I assure you, it’s not.

Anyways, I was heading down the escalator while he was heading up and I saw him and I almost wanted to call out to him — but I didn’t.

I mean, I don’t know if he’d even know who the hell I was.

I’ve always assumed I have one of those very forgettable faces and that I’ve always been pretty much invisible.

I swear, sometimes, I think it’s, like, a superpower! Who needs an invisibility cloak? I can blend into the background at will!

Anyways…I know where he works. (Yes. I did some cyber stalking.)

Should I contact him? I have an excuse already…

Okay…why am I even asking you guys for permission to do something that I’ve pretty much already decided to do?

In other news…there’s this other guy on eHarmony.

I contacted him when I was in my “okay, I’m going to totally settle” phase. He actually seems like a good match…except, I’m a shallow little fool, and now, when I look at his picture, I think, “Maybe I can settle for better.”

No. I’m not going to just ignore him and try for “better.” I’m going to hopefully meet up with him and see how things pan out in “real life.”

I know. I know. You don’t need to say it. You’re proud of me for such obvious emotional growth.

I’m proud of me, too.

(You get that the last two sentences were dripping with sarcasm, right?)